You’re disappointed? Did I
ask to be born? No!
Yah boo! said the yahoo,
the boho yobbo hobo,
whose hobby is playing on the oboe
(though he can’t tell his arse from his elbow)
which he plays all day in Soho
while they film it all in slo-mo
Is there still an Olympic ideal? For if not there should be we feel.
It’d be such a treat if all teams didn’t cheat, thinking each shiny medal’s a steal.
Rogue countries just seem on the make because status is always at stake.
So where some have hope there are others who dope as though it’s oh so clever to fake.
Let’s pray no banned drugs are internal so that Rio is rendered infernal.
Then events will all seem above board — squeaky clean — and thus will the flame burn eternal.
Monday was Hug-an-Atheist Day
but I found that my arms
couldn’t reach all the way
round my body
Tuesday was National Book Lovers Day
but I missed it
I was too busy
reading in bed
Next came International Xenophobia Day
and I spent all Wednesday
Thursday was National Paradox Day
but it took me till nighttime
staying in bed
to puzzle it out
Friday was Who Gives A Damn Day
and I decided to do
just that and go
back to bed
Saturday was the thirteenth
day of the month
and my luck
Sunday was the seventh day
when God rested
Who can argue with that?